More hee. Hee hee hee.

[mandie_rw]

And now I'm finished Breaking Dawn. To sum it up: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Slightly more specific reactions, most yelled by me at various points throughout the reading of this book:
HAHAHA OH GOD can we PLEASE stop talking about things relating to vampire sex, IT'S KILLING ME HERE.
wat? Bella, since when did you decide you WANTED BABIES SO MUCH YOU'D DIE TO HAVE ONE?
LOL at all the chapter titles in Jacob's POV.
Jacob just hit Rosalie in the back of the head with his doggy bowl. AWESOME. Jacob, I think I like you a lot better now.
WHY DOES EVERY CHARACTER IN THIS DAMN BOOK WANT BABIES?! WHAT, IS A WOMAN INCOMPLETE WITHOUT HAVING BABIES? oh, well, at least Leah has some sense...NO LEAH NOT YOU TOO! THIS THEME MAKES ME WANT TO KILL YOU ALL.
ew. Serious ew. Blood, breaking bones, etc. Ew.
HOSHIT JACOB JUST IMPRINTED ON BELLA'S BABY!? that is so WRONG! AHAHAHAHA
waaaay too many pages of fragments of sentences.
oh look,Bella-sparkepire. About time.
Bella kicks everyone's ass at being a sparklepire.
...WHY IS THIS BOOK NOT OVER?
zzzzzzz.
J. Jenks, your plotline bores me and is totally pointless anyway.
zzzzzzzz.
where's the Epic Sparklepire Battle already?
zzzzzzzz.
oh, look, here come the Volturi! Yaaay, Epic Sparklepire Battle that they've all been training for a month for and SPENT 200 PAGES PREPARING FOR will finally happen...
...no, just kidding. No battle?! WHAT IS THIS?
oh, look, everybody's happy, except for Irina, presumably, and her family. Happy ending. Yay.
...is this book over? yes? I can get on with my life. GOOD.

Add in a lot more random laughter and you've pretty much got it.

Comments

[librarianofdoom.livejournal.com]

[insert uncontrollable giggling here]

That just made my day. I haven't read these yet (I'm waiting for the line to die down at the local library, since there's no way I'm paying money for them), but I'm avidly collecting reviews to see if they're every bit as silly as I expect them to be... (I have a sneaking suspicion that the reviews are better than the actual books)

re: the whole babies thing... isn't the author mormon or something like that? that might explain the whole "no woman is complete without babies" philosophy. Go figure.

*giggle* sparklepire. *giggle*

[mandie-rw.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, I'm glad my, er, review was enjoyable! And yeah, I've found all the commentary on Twilight to be much more lol-tastic than the actual books (though I still like them. Inexplicable. I *know* they're awful, and yet...). Ever seen this (http://cleoland.pbwiki.com/Twilight)? It's my favorite resource of all things Twilight. If you ever have a day or three to waste, I highly recommend everything on that page! Especially "Growing Up Cullen" and cleolinda's commentary on the books (which is where I lifted the term "sparklepire" from...and now all my friends use it. Hee.).

Yeah, think I'd heard she's Mormon, which does help expain the OMG! BABIES! thing. *Seriously* annoying either way though! :D Do read the books when you get a chance, though; at the very least, you'll understand EXACTLY what the commentaries are talking about! Even if Breaking Dawn *did* make me want to throw something. Like Breaking Dawn.